How do I become more disciplined? This is a little like asking, "How do I become richer?" In a very real and meaningful way, this is the wrong question.
Often when we can't do something we should be able to do, we think we are missing something that we are not. "I need more discipline."
One error is that some people think that they haven't exercised their “discipline muscle.” Or perhaps they have not exercised it enough.
Others are self-sabotaging by constructing this bad notion that there is something else they need to find or have in order to "be disciplined". Maybe they think it’s something they need to buy?
Sometimes we are instinctively choosing a higher-priority task, and then berating ourselves for not doing a lower-priority task. That is also not helpful. We see ourselves as lacking discipline, when in fact we have acted with discipline.
One might say that this is semantics or just an unnecessary decoration or an ephemeral concept.
There is definitely a pragmatic aspect when it comes to concepts. If a concept changes my actions, then is it really still just a concept?
But even if ideas about 'discipline as a muscle' are just ephemeral concepts, if they prevent you from doing what you need to do, then these ideas are real problems that need to be dealt with.
In fact, it's you who gives the ‘discipline muscle’ concept power over you and your actions. You do this by stopping yourself or by never starting. “I don’t have discipline, so I shouldn’t start exercising or eating right or meditating, until I know I have the discipline to see it through.”
We do not lack discipline. Someone who is called 'lazy' simply lacks behaviors and habits that are calibrated to be consistently good.
Discipline is only properly motivated behavior.
Part of fine-tuning our actions is simply working in a different time-frame than many of our temptations to lesser goods, excuses, procrastinations and resistances.
When we act in a disciplined way, it is often passing on a short-term gain that is appealing yet damaging, and at the same time choosing a long-term gain that promotes proper growth.
So instead of satisfying the immediate craving to eat some chocolate cake after dinner, a person can forgo the cake and choose to crave the health and longevity benefits of what will be better to eat; some more nutritious veggies or meats.
A good example is a bodybuilder. He is long-term motivated and acts in a disciplined way, when he goes to the gym regularly. So now tell him that his muscle growth will be reset to zero on every Sunday. Will he lose his discipline, when he doesn't go to the gym anymore? No, there is no discipline to be lost, he lost his long-term motivation to go to the gym at all.
What most people call "discipline" is a only lagging indicator of many other causes. The leading indicators of discipline are installing realities in our lives like:
environment design (set yourself up for success),
inspiration (discovering and realizing what you are passionate about, or what you admire),
motivation (clearly understanding and quickly recalling the urgent or exciting reasons for taking action),
teamwork (accountability and collaboration and alliances)
identity (seeing the action as being a part of who you are)
action (engaging our willpower to initiate the behavior)
progress momentum (additional motivation towards continuing an effort (or habit) that comes from the feeling of satisfaction in seeing improvements as they happen)
If we have all the other pieces in place, minimal willpower is needed to restart the behavior or habit.
Sometimes the good habits require improvement, but needed improvements to the habit are absent. Take the needed steps to improve the habit.